Tag Archives: amazon

Excited about the latest book in the MCQ Library

Hacking the Human Condition (Scheduled Release October 2018)
#Transgender #Erotica #Suspense #Romance #Hypnosis

Super psyched about my latest book!  It started with a lot of sissification and femdom, but as the story started to take shape, I realized those aspects were for a different group of characters.  I replaced it with a little more suspense and some misdirection keeping the mystery until the end of this 39,000 plus word story.

This is the story of Daniel Mallory, child prodigy who graduated college at fifteen and spent the last nine years working for one of the top security firms in the world.   The company’s continued success is in large part due to Daniel’s raw ability and high intelligence, but with high IQ comes with a number of social inadequacies that has the company worried when it announces it plans to go public.  While Daniel doesn’t seemed worried, a new executive expresses his concerns and makes changes that affect Daniel immensely and his visible distaste has the company recommending therapy for the young professional.

What Daniel doesn’t know is his therapist has a past that is taken out on her patients and Daniel becomes the latest victim.  Along the way, this story goes from suspense, to confusion, to a hypnotic sissy programming that has Daniel questioning his identity and once he learns the truth and his therapist disappears, he becomes determined to uncover the truth and settle the score once and for all.

Calm After the Storm

It’s been a few days and my biography is out for the world to read.  I admit that the last few weeks have been very difficult emotionally.  It became hard to concentrate on anything else except the book.  Now that it is out, I feel a sense of relief, but also a little bit of fear.

How will the book be received?  Writing it for a small number of close people is scary, because there is a closeness to those people and having them learn a deep dark secret can jeopardize that closeness; but releasing it to the world can bring out different opinions.  It can bring out additional support which is always welcomed, but it can bring out those who read the book for a different reason and the reason ties to feelings that are tough to hear.

Some may read the book and while empathetic, some readers may view me and my choices in a way that makes me out to be a self abuser.  Others may simply look at the acts and feel “entertained.”  Both are fine with me to a point, but the anticipation of getting these comments has me in all too familiar territory… scared and curled up in the corner.

While the fear is there, the one thing that has dominated the last few days since the books release is a great sense of calm and satisfaction… and inspiration.  My close friends and I have talked frequently about moving my writing to a more “conventional” genre.  I have played with the idea of writing a more traditional romance, or suspense novel.  Following my familiar steps of putting ideas down on paper, I realized the ideas, seemed dull without a mysterious twist of gender bending.    The idea of having a hero or anti-hero that has “her” own internal struggles added to the plot and for me made the storyline more relatable.

The one thing I wanted to try and move away from – at least a little bit – was the focus on the sex.  I tried this with my latest fiction novel “My Perfect Partner” and the three short story bundle “Handle with Care.”  I added more to the plot and gave the characters more substance, but used the transgender aspects as leverage in the stories.  What I learned is that I think I found the style of writing that was not only exciting but well received.

While I would enjoy more feedback, I have come to realize that it just isn’t going to come.  What I can draw off of are the unit sales and page turns of KDP and now my web site.

So, now I find myself excited about the future of my writing.  Will I continue to write erotic tales? YOU BET!  Will I step out a bit further and try something more traditional or conventional? Sure.  I hope you will come along for the ride and find my writing enjoyable… and if not, close the book and pick up a different one.

 

Desires and Risks… Tough choices for #girlslikeus

decisions… DecisionsDECISIONS.

The thoughts of the last few days have created a quandary for me.  I released a new book that has gotten some very nice reviews so far, which is obviously rare for the genre I write about.  What’s strange this one is that it brings me to a crossroads.  I started writing because I needed a release and it was very therapeutic.  It eventually became a drug and very addictive, but more for the motivating stories that popped into my head and less about the sexual gratification.

In the past, this usually came full circle.  Depression, therapy, motivation, gratification then back again.  The hard part now is that I want more.  My friends have suggested that I crossover from a smut writer to a more “traditional” fiction writer and possibly use my real name.  The thought of moving to the lighter side of fiction was intriguing, but using my real name was terrifying.  Using it meant revealing more than I ever wanted to and could jeopardize my life.

This is not uncommon for anyone living in secret as a transgendered man or woman, but for someone who still feels shame, humiliation, confusion, fear and isolation… it can be overwhelming and can put you on the edge of the blade.  Which brings me to the suggestion that was made recently.

I wrote an autobiography a few years ago as many of you know.  The book was my first and was horribly written because I simply took my journals and threw them together.  I added some graphic memories and tried not to fictionalize them, but after over 30 years, it became difficult to tell a story when pieces of it were missing.  The book didn’t sell and I eventually pulled it off Amazon.

A few months after that, I figured out that Goodreads doesn’t pull books off that easily and it stayed out there for a while creating a little bit of buzz.  The book description prompted a number of questions and direct messages from the LGBTQ community, weirdos and parents asking where they could get a copy of it.  I didn’t feel comfortable at the time and chose instead to respond to each request individually – hoping I could answer the real questions without giving up too much of myself.

After the release of this latest novel My Perfect Partner, a great friend made a comment that the book had some true life experiences that I shared with her; and another friend who has been a great mentor and inspiration to me as a writer suggested I revise the biography and re-release it.  Difficult choices to have that include some risk, but anyone who has skeletons in their closet – whether “normal” or a little bit different – have to deal with risks everyday.

I guess the real question is what to do next.  I work alongside people of all walks of life and those who seem content with their lives are those I tend to shy away from.  I am always looking ahead and trying to be better than I am today.  I am drawn to risk and challenges, but this one is one of the hardest ones to make.

Do I re-release the autobiography?  Do I use my real name?

This may seem like a couple of easy answers… if I am not willing to use my real name, then releasing my autobiography is not that hard of a decision and doesn’t seem like that big of a risk.  The tougher questions are…

Am I considering a re-release to tell the real story or is it just to try and make money?

The money is not really a concern.  If you follow independent writers, you already know they don’t make a lot of money and many don’t write for the financial gain.  The first release as I mentioned was a release for me.  It was a way of talking to someone who was willing to listen and understand.  That someone was my wife, who really never knew about my past in graphic detail.  After she read it, she understood but never really wanted to talk about it again.  That was enough for me, but now I think it may be a good idea to take another stab at it and see if anyone else is willing to offer an opinion.  Whether you are connected to it in some way, for it or against it.  Maybe the story just needs to be told.

What do you think?